Just like string, we have limits too. It doesn't stretch out as much as we think it would, and just like those fancy streamers at birthday parties, we fall down. I've come to realise that even as our streamer unpins from the wall, we try to pin it to pretending. Pretending we're okay through everything. We know we're not. Certain people notice that you're not, but you still convince them that you're okay. There's no point in holding onto that. Holding onto pretends. I've lived these past 6 months pretending that I'm okay, but now I'm just on the verge of losing it all. I've given up on hope. On freedom. But I try, I really try to be okay. But I'm done with pretending. I want to be real. Even if being real causes you to see my pain. Just don't feel it. Because I'm really okay.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Just like string, we have limits too. It doesn't stretch out as much as we think it would, and just like those fancy streamers at birthday parties, we fall down. I've come to realise that even as our streamer unpins from the wall, we try to pin it to pretending. Pretending we're okay through everything. We know we're not. Certain people notice that you're not, but you still convince them that you're okay. There's no point in holding onto that. Holding onto pretends. I've lived these past 6 months pretending that I'm okay, but now I'm just on the verge of losing it all. I've given up on hope. On freedom. But I try, I really try to be okay. But I'm done with pretending. I want to be real. Even if being real causes you to see my pain. Just don't feel it. Because I'm really okay.
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